God’s Pattern For Marriage

It never ceases to amaze me how in God’s providence He moves in my life and in the life of this devotional. We left off in the Sermon on the Mount in Matthew 5:31-32:

    “Furthermore it has been said, ‘Whoever divorces his wife, let him give her a certificate of divorce.’ But I say to you that whoever divorces his wife for any reason except sexual immorality causes her to commit adultery; and whoever marries a woman who is divorced commits adultery.”

Today is Karen and my 13th Anniversary. We were both married once before so we know the sting of divorce. And because of that, and plus our meeting in Sunday school, we have tried to model a Biblical marriage. I am grateful for my beautiful bride and echo Solomon’s words:

    “He who finds a wife finds a good thing, and obtains favor from the LORD.” (Proverbs 18:22)

So is Jesus teaching in His Sermon that He is okay with divorce? No, He is teaching on the sacredness of marriage. Look how He answered the Pharisees’ question about divorce in Matthew 19:

    “The Pharisees also came to Him, testing Him, and saying to Him, ‘Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for just any reason?’ And He answered and said to them, ‘Have you not read that He who made them at the beginning “made them male and female,” and said, “For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh”? So then, they are no longer two but one flesh. Therefore what God has joined together, let not man separate.’ They said to Him, ‘Why then did Moses command to give a certificate of divorce, and to put her away?’ He said to them, ‘Moses, because of the hardness of your hearts, permitted you to divorce your wives, but from the beginning it was not so. And I say to you, whoever divorces his wife, except for sexual immorality, and marries another, commits adultery; and whoever marries her who is divorced commits adultery.’” (Matthew 19:2-9)

Silly Pharisees always trying to trip up Jesus with Scripture. They point Jesus to the Book of Deuteronomy and He points them to the Book of Genesis! And as a side note, for anyone who entertains that churches can ordain gay marriage, make sure you tear Matthew 19 out of your bibles.

God ordained marriage because he didn’t want man to alone, remember?

    “And the LORD God said, ‘It is not good that man should be alone; I will make him a helper comparable to him.’ Out of the ground the LORD God formed every beast of the field and every bird of the air, and brought them to Adam to see what he would call them. And whatever Adam called each living creature, that was its name. So Adam gave names to all cattle, to the birds of the air, and to every beast of the field. But for Adam there was not found a helper comparable to him. And the LORD God caused a deep sleep to fall on Adam, and he slept; and He took one of his ribs, and closed up the flesh in its place. Then the rib which the LORD God had taken from man He made into a woman, and He brought her to the man.” (Genesis 2:18-22)

Before Eve it was just Adam and the Animals, which might be a cool name for a band, but not what God had in mind for creation. But more important than fellowship was God wanted humans to be a family. He had ordained the family back in Genesis 1:

    “So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them. Then God blessed them, and God said to them, ‘Be fruitful and multiply; fill the earth and subdue it; have dominion over the fish of the sea, over the birds of the air, and over every living thing that moves on the earth.’” (Genesis 1:27-28)

Let me pose a question: would venereal diseases, abortion, and AIDS exist today if humans had followed God’s pattern for marriage? I don’t see how it would be possible! In the precept and principle of marriage comes the protection from these horrible results of fornication and sexual immorality. And the provision is that God allows a man and a woman to have sex, to physically, emotionally, and spiritually enjoy each other in a guilt-free and God-blessed manner. The Apostle Paul addressed this matter in his first letter to the Corinthian church:

    “Now concerning the things of which you wrote to me: It is good for a man not to touch a woman. Nevertheless, because of sexual immorality, let each man have his own wife, and let each woman have her own husband. Let the husband render to his wife the affection due her, and likewise also the wife to her husband. The wife does not have authority over her own body, but the husband does. And likewise the husband does not have authority over his own body, but the wife does. Do not deprive one another except with consent for a time, that you may give yourselves to fasting and prayer; and come together again so that Satan does not tempt you because of your lack of self-control.” (1 Corinthians 7:1-5)

Now if a person wants to get married just so he or she can have sex, I recommend you take a cold shower. Too many marriages end because they start out in lust. Jesus reminded the Pharisees of why God ordained marriage and of what it should consist. It allowed for sex for pleasure and pro-creation, and it was a permanent thing.

Bro Dennis always uses the analogy of two planks of wood being glued together. The only way you can separate the two planks is to pry them apart. And when you do you will see that parts of the one plank is torn away and remains on the other. Divorce is always destructive.

And again, God created Adam and Eve, not Adam and Steve, or Adam and Eve, Betty, Lisa, Peggy, and so on. One man and one woman; that’s it…that’s the Biblical model

If you have been through divorce and are still hurting from its destruction, turn to Jesus. He will become your Husband; we are His precious bride. And if He should see fit to unite you again in holy matrimony, never forget that it is a gift from God.

The Apostle Paul wrote:

    “Wives, submit to your own husbands, as to the Lord. For the husband is head of the wife, as also Christ is head of the church; and He is the Savior of the body. Therefore, just as the church is subject to Christ, so let the wives be to their own husbands in everything. Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself for her, that He might sanctify and cleanse her with the washing of water by the word, that He might present her to Himself a glorious church, not having spot or wrinkle or any such thing, but that she should be holy and without blemish. So husbands ought to love their own wives as their own bodies; he who loves his wife loves himself. For no one ever hated his own flesh, but nourishes and cherishes it, just as the Lord does the church. For we are members of His body, of His flesh and of His bones. ‘For this reason a man shall leave his father and mother and be joined to his wife, and the two shall become one flesh.’ This is a great mystery, but I speak concerning Christ and the church. Nevertheless let each one of you in particular so love his own wife as himself, and let the wife see that she respects her husband.” (Ephesians 5:22-33)

Husbands, love your wives as precious gifts. Jesus sees the Church as a precious gift from His Heavenly Father. Love your wife in such a manner.

Wives, respect your husbands. If you talk to your husband in an openly disdainful and disrespectful manner know that you are not only on the road to divorce, but you are also living in sin.

I have not always loved Karen as I am commanded to; I pledge to do better.

I love you honey, happy anniversary!

In Christ
Dave
Ps. 37:4

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    Copyright © 2011 David Jeffers

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